Because we were bored Naruto Edition
by Psycoticat
Summary: As the title suggests, this was brought on by boredom. This is a series of of drabbles that were created spur of the moment by bored childcare workers. We figured this would be safer than tormenting the children. We kinda would like to keep our jobs...
1. Intro

**Because we were bored…**

**Naruto Edition.**

I and a co-worker are both fans of Naruto and Bleach. I like Naruto more than Bleach and she likes Bleach more than Naruto. So we decided that we would do ongoing drabbles of crack ideas that we came up with while working childcare. Due to the age group we deal with, they bring in their homework and sit a table quietly working away with occasional attempts at trying to get the answers out of us. It doesn't work by the way. Anyways, we get bored during the time they spend writing so we talk about fics we've read and chat about spur of the moment crack ideas. Most of these are spur the moment, undeveloped ideas that never make it onto paper are quite funny. Or at least we find it so. We have talked for months that we need to write some of this down. We never did, but we talked about this about a month ago and thought it would be fun. Each chapter will more than likely be a different crack. Since all of crack ideas that we had and will have fall under the category "Because we were bored" it will all be found here. Some of it will make sense, some of it won't. There will be long chapters and short chapter with everything in-between. X3

Truth is, this isn't even a chapter, so I just want to apologize now. This is an introduction / back-story of the madness that will go on here. There will be crossovers as well as OC's involved. Mostly because we thought it would be interesting to see how said character would react in said world. There will also be what if ideas and well, I won't give away all the details. You'll just have to read it yourself.

I will say this. I like reviews. If you don't like it, just state simply that you don't and leave it at that. If you have CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, I will accept that. I have noticed that people get… flame happy when they see something they don't like and will rip a person apart. I have seen one too many authors quit a story because people have tend to forget that this a place for creative writing within a world created by another author. Granted there is a slight box for us to work in, but there are no restraints within that box. But sadly, we live in an insensitive world and things like emotions and feelings tend to be overlooked because we do not wish to admit that they ARE there. Granted, I have not been flamed like this. YET. But I know it can and more than likely WILL happen. If it does, I will message you to grow up and I will delete said review. For it serves no purpose other than to annoy people. Keep in mind, I work CHILDCARE. I hear enough whining and complaining there. Do you really think I will tolerate it here?

Just so you know, reviews will not make me come out with new stuff any faster. I work several jobs and don't have as much time as I used to. I will however try to be consistent in putting out chapters. I will not promise that though. Life has proven to me that it has one too many curve balls and monkey wrenches to through with a never ending abundance. I also wish to point out that I have no beta reader. Everything I upload is self edited so I can guarantee that there are mistakes in punctuation and perhaps grammar.

I am rambling now. Sorry about that. If you haven't figured out by the title, I am doing the Naruto edition. Should be interesting. I will warn you now that there is no that order I will be going in. One chapter might take place in the second series while the next could take place while the rookies are in the academy. There is no set time frame. Like I stated before, these are drabbles that created in a moment of boredom. Kind of sad huh? But I will say this. Coming up with crack fic ideas is far more entertaining than discussing the weather in a place that see's almost 330 days of clear sky.

"So how's the weather been?" "Oh sunny and warm." "Really? Wasn't it like that yesterday?" "I am afraid so…"

Yeah. Talking about the weather is boring here.

I probably should stop now. You would all probably like to see an actual fic here instead of the story behind the crack or my rants about flaming and other such nonsense…


	2. How Much

**Because we were bored…**

**Naruto Edition**

**And so the madness begins. This one's going to be a short one.**

_Thinking…_

_**Bijuu/Summon thinking**_

"Normal talking"

**"Bijuu/ Summon talking"**

**How much…**

_Stupid bunshin. Stupid chakra. No matter how good I get my control it's never enough. Every time I try to make a normal bunshin it explodes._ Naruto looks up as if a light bulb just went off over his head. _I wonder… Uh, I probably should get to a more secluded area first…_

Fifteen minutes later in a secluded area that had no designation Naruto creates three kage bunshin and starts to channel as much chakra as he can to see just how much they can take before they explode like the regular bunshin. _Man, this taking forever. I wonder how much chakra these things can hold. How much do I have?_ After about five minutes Naruto notices that his clones have become unstable. He pauses and realizes his mistake. "Oh crap this is going to hurt"

"_BOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!"_

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Ugh, here I am at the fox's cage. Again. I wonder what cruelty he will bellow this time…_

**"You insignificant idiot! Are you trying to kill me? No, don't answer that. It was a rhetorical question. Not that you would know the meaning of it anyways. LEAVE! I do not wish to see your face you bald monkey!"**

_And off we go again. Oh well. I hope Ba-chan won't kill me for this…_

**---**

**And there is short number 1...  
**


	3. Kyuubi meets OC

**Because we were bored…**

**Naruto Edition**

If you have read my other story, you will find one of my favorite hobbies is to think of ways to torment the egotistical fox. I am introducing an OC of mine that has existed for almost 10 years now. She is a bit of a sadist, but then again, she is the product of a mind that had been exposed to the things women will scream at their husbands in childbirth at the tender age of 5. If you're curious, my mother worked labor and delivery and I was sitting in the nurses station waiting for my father to come pick me up. But then again, he worked in physical rehab patients at another hospital at the time. I was exposed to some rather colorful stuff there too now that I think about it…

_Thinking…_

**_Bijuu/Summon thinking_**

"Normal talking"

"**Bijuu/ Summon talking"**

**Kyuubi meets the OC…**

**

* * *

**

_Drip_

_Drip_

_Drip_

**FWOMP!**

The Kyuubi opens his eyes to see what could have made the sound. He sees a giant bag on the ground in front of his cage. He also notices that it is moving as if something was in it. He narrows his eyes as a humanoid makes its way out of the bag holding a few things.

"**You are not the bald male monkey. Who are you?**"

"Oh little ole me? I am a collector of all things. I go for the rarest of finds. Everything from mind worms, weebles, crystals to egotistical bastards balls."

He just looked at her. He also noticed that she smelled of brimstone and oddly enough almost draconic. He pondered a bit about what she said and asked, "**And just what do you think you are going to collect here**?"

She smiled a sickly sweet smile and held out her rusty spork, can of gasoline and a giant jar filled with formaldehyde. "Why, I am here to collect egotistical bastard balls."

He cringes and crosses his hind legs and whimpers. For some reason, the draconic lady's aura scares the crap out of him. Now if he could only figure out why before she takes his most prized jewels and places them in that giant jar…

* * *

I know this is evil. XD You will all live. She will return. By the way, her name is Khistanth. She is my brain child with quite the history. And before anyone gets any ideas, she IS strait. She is very much like me. She can't stand guys that are full of themselves. Actually, her personality is a similar version of mine now that I think about it…


End file.
